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INSIDE AURORA: Predictions for 2018

January 24, 2018   ·   0 Comments

By Scott Johnston

Earlier this month we looked back on events in Town that occurred during 2017. Now, let’s take a peek ahead at what may await Aurora in 2018.

January – Town officials are unsure what to do with a time capsule unearthed during the demolition of the old library that says “do not open until the library’s centennial in 2067”.

February – Emerging early in the month, the groundhog cannot see his shadow, not due to clouds, but because his burrow is shaded out by early provincial and municipal election signs.

February – Caught up in both the season’s unusually cold weather and Winter Olympic fever, using the soon-to-be-vacated Magna property for a future Olympic bid becomes the best option suggested by Aurorans so far for this site.

March – Debates about the historical implications in modifying the Armory, and fears of subsequent noise and parking impacts on the neighbourhood once it is occupied, prompt someone to suggest renaming it “The Aurora Institute of Food and Whine”.

March – Aurora becomes a town further divided, when increased GO train service makes it even harder to safely cross the train tracks.

April – By this time the majority of Aurorans will remember to stop putting out their garbage and recycling on last year’s pick up days of the week, and start doing so on the dates that became effective January 1st.

April – Council decides to defer the ballot question of whether to divide the Town up into four wards, until it has further reduced the number of councillors to that number.

May – Officials scratch their heads trying to figure out what to call Canada’s upcoming birthday, as unlike “sesquicentennial” in use last year, there’s not a catchy name for a 151st birthday.

June – After twenty years of deliberations, which finally resulted in a decision on the features to be included in the new Library Square, the next phase begins of consultation, design and construction, which is estimated will also take about twenty years.

July – Town officials insist it’s only a coincidence when the first Concert in the Park following the legalization of marijuana is a Huey Lewis tribute band that starts its set with “I Want a New Drug”.

August – The wettest summer in recent memory has residents wishing for sunny weather, and wondering why the annual water ban is still ongoing.

September – Excitement at the larger than usual attendance at the Town’s first public budget meeting is dampened when it is found most of the ten attendees have mistakenly thought that this was where they get tickets for next month’s Haunted Forest event at Sheppard’s Bush.

October – Richmond Hill residents rejoice when Aurora’s new Rec Complex is confirmed to be going on Bloomington, a site that is far closer to and more convenient for them than it will be to most Aurora residents.

October – Technical difficulties with the new at-home electronic ballot option for the municipal election are found to be stemming from most residents not actually voting for anyone, but hitting the “delete” button when the list of candidates’ names appears on their electronic devices.

November – The new hotel opens with a motto geared to Aurora residents: “We’ll leave a welcoming light on for you…. but a low power one, well away from neighbouring houses, with shading to reduce glare, and that is only on until dusk”.

December – Aurorans identify as their most popular Christmas wish – a 2019 without another election.

Feel free to e-mail
Scott at: machellscorners@gmail.com

         

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