SENIOR SCAPE: Ask, Ask Ask

June 13, 2018 · 0 Comments

By Christina Doyle

Ask, and it shall be given to you, seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you. Matthew 7:7
Do you resist asking for help-until it’s your last resort? You’re not alone!
To our ladies and gents: When was the last time you felt comfortable asking anybody for anything–for help, for advice and even the ultimate asking question about…that ever never will I ask for…. directions! I know at times we are terrified, embarrassed about asking for any kind of help!However, it’s in the asking that we sometimes get what we want.
There is a deep sense of humility that comes over us, “Me…ask?…No, I would rather suffer.”
We don’t ask because sometimes we are afraid somebody will say no. That is wishful thinking, so we don’t ask and then, of course, we aren’t denied anything either!
There might also be a fear of judgement by the other person, especially if you need help with something that you feel guilty about. Judgement is itself a very real form of rejection.Sometimes we don’t want to feel like we have burdened someone else with our concerns. This self-consciousness in talking about yourself and any problems you are experiencing to someone else makes us hesitate to share anything. So, when it comes to asking for help we might be afraid of what would be expected of us in return, especially if we are at a low point where we don’t feel like we have anything to give.
I think for me,during my illness,that if I asked for help it would be like losing control of the situation and a sign of my own weakness. Perhaps you too were brought up with importance placed on pride and the fact that you are to be resilient, self-reliant, and independent.
No matter where you are in your life, we all need help of some kind now and then. Asking comes with no guarantees and here is the thing, where and what is there a guarantee of?
So, today, start asking: Have you been quite lonely these days? Have you been needing some help of some kind, even a shoulder to cry on? Remember that door is always open if we could just bring ourselves to ask.We can’t do everything on our own as much as we think. Ask a friend, ask for guidance, and even ask for a miracle.
When asking for help, make sure the person knows exactly what you want. It would be nice if someone spontaneously offered to help you, however, the more you practice in directly asking for help in these situations, the easier it gets. The other benefit in asking for help is that you will prevent the problem from getting bigger and you will feel a lot less stressed. Take a leap of faith toward the help you seek, be grateful in the process. Gratitude will allow you to remain gracious and open regardless of the answer to your request. Above all, say thank you.
Just remember, as Michele L. Sullivan, speaker and social innovator said,“The only shoes you can walk in are your own. With compassion, courage and understanding, we can walk together side by side. There’s no shame in admitting you can’t do everything on your own. Asking for help doesn’t devalue you in any way. It can enable you to advance, connect you meaningfully with others, bolster your productivity and ability to do things with greater ease, and better prepare you for your next challenge.” This beautiful month of June, lets get our stride, let’s be bold and take one step at a time, and, if you are in need of help, go ahead and ask with a smile on your face!

HAPPENINGS AT THE
SENIORS’ CENTRE

Wood Carving. Have you ever thought that you would like to carve something out of wood? If so, the wood carvers get together in the wood shop every Tuesday and Thursday. So if you want to try your hand at wood carving, come out at 9.30 a.m. on each of those days.

Line Dance. Need some exercise? Then why not try line dancing at 6 p.m. every Tuesday. It is a lot of fun.

Seniors Information and Active Living Fair. This will be held on Saturday, June 16 from 9 a.m. to 1 p.m. at the Aurora Seniors’ Centre. Admission is free. There will be vendors, fitness demonstrations, health seminars, and many other items.